February 2008 Archives

Cheeky Ninja Angel Chef seemed like a bit of a gimmick when he swooped silently onto the nation's screens in 2005. But 12 BAFTAs, ten bestselling books, nine cookwear ranges and five mysterious TV chef assassinations later, it's clear he's here to stay. 

But what is Cheeky Ninja Angel Chef's secret? Let's have a look at his recipe (!) for success.

1. Apron
The badge of tradition and competence.

2. Simple dishes
No-one likes time-consuming recipes with dozens of ingredients. Cheeky Ninja Angel Chef says: why not just stick some raw food on a plate?

3. Sticky-out tongue plus ninja knife
For 'edge'.

4. Wings
Virtuous, but also a little kinky. They can be a fire hazard when Cheeky Ninja Angel Chef is cooking with gas, although paradoxically they can be used to put fires out if flapped rapidly.

5. Rubber gloves
Everyone wears rubber gloves on TV - even Wogan - because of the rays from the cameras. The great thing about cookery shows is you don't have to hide them with make-up.

I became Stockport's Strongest Man by ripping a telephone in half. It's a difficult thing to practice, because people generally like to keep their phones in one piece. But my brother works at BT and they have this place that is basically a graveyard of old phones. He'd let me in at night so I could train. It was pretty spooky - heaps and heaps of dusty old phones, all lit by flickering torches - and I was always thinking, what if one of them rings? Should I answer it? What if it's a ghost? You just have to be disciplined and get on with it, really. Thinking like that gets you nowhere.

I do feel I have a responsibility to be a good role model for the kids. I recently starred in an advertising campaign designed to stop children squashing spiders in the Granada area. It shows me shaking hands with a spider, proving that we can all get along if we just set aside our differences.

I wear these banana-coloured swimming trunks everywhere I go. Even when I met the Mayoress of Cheshire!  She didn't seem to mind, though she did put some newspaper down on my chair. People think I wear them to show off my physique, but actually it's because I lost the key to my locker at the Grand Central Pools.

I'm not actually sure if spiders have hands. I think it's only monkeys that have hands, isn't it? Apart from us, I mean. Monkeys and koala bears - I'm sure I've seen a koala bear sucking its thumb.

You can see that I'm not actually lifting up these two girls in the picture. But if I was taller, they would definitely be hanging above the ground by the power of my biceps alone. I wonder if one of them will lend me their socks?